THERE is no road map or formula as far as parenting millennials is concerned.
That is, for Oscar Sañez.
“It [parenting millennials] all boils down to the basic question of communication and connection,” said Sañez, vice president for international cluster of San Miguel Purefoods Inc.
“We all go through the difficult adolescent years and my kids went through [with] their own,” Sañez told the BusinessMirror in an e-mail interview. “Having the parents staying close to them for advice and concern during this stage is very critical.”
Sañez has three children: Maria (35), Isabel (32) and Juan (30).
According to Sañez, the difficulties both he and his children experienced were when they were out of the country.
“The one thing that just became more difficult for us was that we had been expatriates in the US and Japan and a couple of other countries during those years and therefore the challenge of having to adjust to a new school every so often simply added to the pressures of growing up and learning how to adjust.”
Regarding the generation gap, Sañez pointed out it is in the way millennials perceive the essentials of life and how they deal with them. With the pervasive and quick access to information, the former head of the Information Technology-Business Process Management Association of the Philippines believes the millennials’ concept of time-life experience is quite different compared to his generation. Their planning horizon is quite short and they value “experiences” more than material wealth or savings.
Paradigm shift
SAÑEZ believes parents today must prepare for a paradigm shift.
These days they have to be prepared to learn from their kids as much as they impart new knowledge in them, according to him. In his case, he said he continues to learn a lot from his millennial children on the issue of healthy living and discipline around healthy choices.
“As we pursue our own individual health goals, I find myself being inspired by their own progress,” Sañez said. “I wonder if many parents have experienced this and have shifted paradigms.”
He said millennials have a different concept of time.
“They grew up in an environment where the world was turning digital and information came much faster with a higher degree of intensity than during our time,” Sañez said. Moreover, they are used to quicker answers to questions and faster solutions to problems, he added.
“This is good actually, but they need to learn how to be circumspect with how they respond to issues. They can take advantage of the digital environment by trying to access more angles and perspectives around the issues and then becoming more critical with how they respond to them,” he said. “Critical thinking will be one of the more vital skills in the years to come.”
Not brats
BASED on his parenting experience, Sañez refuses to label millennials as brats.
He argues they have a higher regard for self and individual needs versus others. He understands the situation of the millennials because he said the world they grew up in has become more competitive than the one he knew.
“They are expected to take a stand on many issues in today’s world and that they need to speak up in order to have the competitive edge,” he said. “That sense of responsiveness and natural outspokenness is sometimes seen by the adults as being brattish. But it’s certainly not about that.”
He admires today’s youth because they put a premium on information and knowledge.
Love, trust
SAÑEZ urges millennials to take information to a much higher level and learn how to add the all-important ingredient of insight and learning and then later application of these learning experiences in other environments.
“They can combine their love of experiences with discovering new insights and furthering the quest for new knowledge. Today’s relationships, in my observation, are very much anchored on life experiences and discovery. They have been enabled by the digital environment,” he emphasized. “At the end of the day, though, what will make for lasting relationships are the same old ingredients of love and trust and concern for each other’s welfare.”
Image credits: Oscar Sañez