AS we spend another Christmas in the coronavirus pandemic still raging, I want to direct parents to a more positive and purposeful holiday and 2022 the gift of “SEL”or Socio-Emotional Learning. According to www.edutopia.org, “Maurice Elias, a psychology professor at Rutgers University and director of the university’s Social-Emotional Learning Lab, describes SEL as the process through which we learn to recognize and manage emotions, care about others, make good decisions, behave ethically and responsibly, develop positive relationships, and avoid negative behaviors.”
We are all aware of the uncertainties in going back to in-person school. Many parents like myself fear the further negative effects this may have on our kids. I choose to direct my kids’ learning today toward the other skills of a 21st century learner other than Content and Critical Thinking, which they learn more in school. (The other Cs, according to Hirsh-Pasek, include Communication, Collaboration, Creative Innovation and Confidence). I found my “one” solution through SEL.
It is an interesting trivia I learned from the same web site that the roots of SEL are as old as ancient Greece when Plato wrote about education in The Republic. Plato proposed “a holistic curriculum that requires a balance of training in physical education, the arts, math, science, character, and moral judgment.” Today, an organization called CASEL (Collaborative for Academic, Social, and Emotional Learning), which originated from Yale, even exists “to establish social and emotional learning as an essential part of education.”
As I see my kids repeatedly struggle and overcome the challenges this pandemic, I realize how building our children’s socio-emotional side is equally, if not even more important in these ever-changing times. For my holiday article, I would like to share to you
the works and thoughts of three very interesting people that may serve as a guide for us parents in SEL: Valerie Cheng, a children’s book author based in Singapore; Amabel Japitana, co-founder of kindlittlehands; and Lia Cua, a bright teenager who opened her online bookstore this pandemic. Valerie Cheng wrote a book, titled Where in the World is Peace? This has a simple but powerful message: that we all experience anxiety, stress and big feeling moments at one point in our lives, but we will eventually find our peace with some simple exercises. I like this book because it teaches calming skills to kids, like breathing, mindfulness, meditation, letting go, and affirmations, which I only learned in my 20s. It is available onlike via Amazon, Barnes and Noble, Book Depository, Powell’s, Booktopia and other independent book sites.
With her simple but powerful book, I asked her a few questions on “Simplifying Parenting”:
What are your views with your husband on the importance of Socio-Emotional Learning for your children? Does it differ for each child?
My husband and I believe social and emotional learning (SEL) is extremely important to help children manage their emotions, feel and show empathy for others, make responsible decisions, and to communicate and have healthy relationships with people around them.
We think most of the tools used for SEL are applicable for all ages, for both children and adults. Even though each child is in a different developmental stage and each child has their own unique personality and a different learning style, the tools we can use are all applicable. We just need to make sure we take an eye-level approach in communicating to each child appropriate to their age.
What activities or tools do you usually use for your child in developing SEL? Do you consider play time an important part of this? Why so?
There are lots of activities and tools we use to help our children develop SEL. We believe it is the little things that are important. It’s the day-to-day experience that matters. We bond and communicate with them, we bring the kids to the parks to play, we do arts and crafts, we cook together, we feed fishes together, we volunteer and help different organizations so they learn empathy and compassion, we do Family Trust Circle time, and we meditate together at night. We make sure the communication lines are always open, so they can come to us for help and support anytime. We also make sure we play together as a family.
Play time is extremely important for children, because it is through play that children learn how to interact with the world around them. Play helps them to understand who they are, to understand cause and effect, to learn problem-solving and decision-making skills. It also hones their creativity, develops their motor skills, develops their communication and language skills, and develops empathy and confidence.
Next week, let me share more on Valerie’s thoughts, as well as the unique organization called kindlittlehumans.