Kaspersky, a global cyber-security company founded in 1997, released a report in September based on the results of a 2018 and 2019 survey. The report reveals there has been a double-digit growth in children using the Internet for accessing software, audio and video web sites in Southeast Asia. For the Philippines, the growth went up from 25.41 percent to 49.12 percent. The top 3 Internet activities among kids in 2019 are software, audio and video web sites; online messaging; and electronic commerce.
This a consequence of today’s highly Internet-dependent families. This is not meant to be a judgment of parents who allow their kids more “screen time” than the next parent. It is for me a reality check for the parent to be aware and take control of the situation. My stand has always been to be “phygital” (physical + digital) and push for an active environment for my kids. At this age where everyone is so digitally connected, I find ways to ensure “human connections” do not suffer.
I believe each parent knows their child best and how to guide their kids’ digital habits. Our house is not a “screen-free” household. We all love our own apps, YouTube and Netflix shows. We would watch movies and series like Brooklyn Nine-Nine or Kissing Booth. My son is even into Fortnite. However, we are aware that when any one of us gets too much screen time, there are mood changes and so we all remind each other. When my son gets too excited with his game, we would divert his attention by going out or playing sports. My daughter enjoys her episodes of Dance Moms, cooking videos, as well as reading books.
I learned that starting the kids young on play could prevent screen time addiction. When my son was into Yokai series at six, I also bought him the book to learn about the characters more. When my daughter was into the cooking YouTube channel Nerdie Nummies by Rosanna Pansino, I would indulge her by going to Santi’s Deli to buy the ingredients she saw so she could replicate the recipe. Today that my kids are 10 and 13, play can still trump screen time when we play card games or sports. I remember some of the gifts that my kids received in the past that promoted active play—a Japanese ceramic knife, an Imarflex mixer, an Orbea bike, Crayola marker maker toys, a violin music stand, gift cards from bookstores and puzzle games—and thank the gift-givers who chose them.
As I wrote in my three-part article in September 2018, the negative effects of too much screen time is real. Today, I believe it would take a strong and conscious effort among not just our immediate family, but everyone around us, to jolt us to active play mode. Maybe if we give more active gifts this Christmas, we can influence our nephews, nieces, godchildren and so on to engage in nonscreen time activities.
Since most of us are finishing our Christmas gift lists this November, I thought of sharing excerpts of an interesting online article I read by Dr. Screen-Free Mom on choosing “Screen-Free” type of gifts. She suggests to “search for gifts for your child that will encourage his or her natural development” like the Melissa and Doug Cleaning Kit, or making a free library for your child.
Below are some of her general guidelines for avoiding bad gifts:
- Avoid the cartoon- or movie-branded toys. Research suggests children do not play with these toys in a creative fashion, and rather use them to rehearse scenes and conflicts from the film.
- Avoid toys that can be played with in only one fashion,
- Avoid toys that have too many bells and whistles (literally). When toys make a great deal of noise, children use them in less creative ways and talk less during their play. Parents are also less likely to engage with their child when they play with a loud toy (they don’t want to compete).
- Avoid toys that promote rigid gender roles. Chose gender-neutral coloring when possible (this also ensures your toys can last for multiple children).
- Avoid toys that attempt to teach your child. Toys that attempt to teach your child are often overstimulating and dropped rather quickly. Play is the ideal context for learning; the toy doesn’t need to recite the ABC’s to make it happen.
- Avoid toys that in any way encourage violence or promote the over-sexualizing of children’s play. Most schools, playgrounds and parks do not allow toy guns for a variety of reasons. Choose toys that can be played with in a pro-social fashion. Your child’s play becomes your child’s behavior. I love how she also positively guides us in choosing good gifts. She uses an easy-to-remember acronym, S.P.O.I.L., which are categories to pick from when we do our gift shopping:
- Social—gifts that encourage social interaction
- Play—gifts that foster free play
- Outdoor—gifts that encourage being outdoors
- Independent work—gifts that foster work
- Literacy—gifts that encourage reading and writing
Next week, let me expound on more examples from Dr. Screen-Free Mom, as well as my thoughts on active gifts for the whole family.