LAST month, I started a series, “Mom to Meagan and Marcus [M squared]” abbreviated to M2M2. This is my attempt to pass on life lessons to my kids. Here goes my second M2M2 about birthdays.
“Here is a funny story. Mom once received a brown box of quail eggs for my birthday. It was wrapped like any other present so when I opened it, the small eggs scattered on my parents’ bed. I think I was around 6 years old. One of my aunts knew that I always took an extra colored quail egg when party noodles were served. I remember feeling very grateful that someone would notice this and gift me with something so thoughtful.
“A birthday celebration at my grandparents’ place was ‘family cozy.’ My grandmother would cook noodles. We would have ice cream, then blow the cake after. In grade school, my birthdays expanded to include a few friends coming over for spaghetti and barbecue. In 1986, it was a bigger celebration because we had just moved in our new home. Our house was at the back of Edsa. Toward the end of the party, we heard choppers in the sky and people walking in the streets. It was the start of the Edsa revolution.
“In high school, it was about surprises. From surprise gifts to my first-ever surprise party from my Poveda barkada, up to my guy best friend flying in from Canada to be my debut escort, I truly felt wonder and gratitude. When I was in college, birthdays were a time to say thanks. There was a birthday when I prepared a thank you gift for every member of my family. After college, I found my second family at work. For all the early morning ingresses, to rush deliveries at the warehouse and train our sales teams, I enjoyed knowing and truly being with my team. When I turned 25, I felt every birthday came by faster. When I became a mom, my birthdays were about waking up and seeing how loud you two and Dad will greet mom for her birthday.
“This year, my birthday was a weekend of flashbacks and in-the-moment experiences. I wrote an entry in my journal about a favorite birthday memory. I had a birthday breakfast date with Dad before his race. I went to my favorite Church to be still and drown out the world for a few minutes. It is funny how I gave myself a priceless gift of a good afternoon nap while you guys were off to fencing class.
“I also thought a great birthday gift was Mom taking you to experience my ‘favorites.’ I am glad you enjoyed Café Breton, whose Manila branch I used to go a lot for their ‘La Pinay’ crepe. It was fun playing basketball at Time Zone, like how your Dad and I used to compete when we were going out. Meagan, thanks for indulging mom and joining me in the karaoke booth. Marcus, hope you enjoyed us singing your favorite Owl City song, ‘Fireflies.’ In the evening, we were lucky Grand Uncle Alejo was still in Manila to celebrate mom’s birthday with us.
Mom loves art. Although she does not draw or paint that well, mom loves colors. I love how artists express colors in various ways. It was great to see both of you enjoying yourselves as much as mom at the Art Fair Philippines held at The Link. Finally, and to reward both of you for your surprise ‘Steak’ birthday song, we all had a great birthday steak dinner with Dad to conclude mom’s birthday.
“Meagan and Marcus, birthdays for mom are and will always be about gratitude. It is being thankful for the simplest, most intangible things life has given mom. I appreciate waking up with the four of us squeezing in one bed. I appreciate Manang Maria [our oldest cook in my grandmother’s place] finding time to call and greet me. I appreciate the countless good wishes from people around me. It makes me see the cumulative result of my being. My birthday has become a day to see, as if from a screen, how my life has unfolded. It is seeing what my life principles have built.
“I hope that when you are both older, you will be able to see your birthdays bearing the full concept of your life’s ‘cumulativeness’ as well. As both of you love math, you would appreciate this more. Mom sees one’s life as like a line made up of infinite points. If the points are seen as the experiences we face everyday, then in the course of forming this line, it’s our choice to make each moment bear full meaning. My hope for you is that since each point is worthwhile, your life becomes a thicker line.
“I hope both of you enjoyed my birthday weekend as much as mom did!”