BODY shaming: We’ve all been there.
Whether it happens alone or in a group, in a dressing room or by the poolside in swimsuit, at one point or another, we’ve sat around ruthlessly picking our bodies apart, grabbing at every “extra” inch of fat and pointing out every spot of cellulite.
We call attention to our “trouble areas” and express dissatisfaction with certain parts of our bodies, all the while secretly, hoping those around us will join in on the negative self-identification.
Body shaming often creates a bonding effect among people as we find comfort in shared flaws and hatred for our shapes. We use this bond to justify the unhealthy and addicting behavior that it truly is.
It’s time we jump off the body shaming box. It’s time to stop focusing on what we not like about our figures. It’s time to start highlighting not only on what we enjoy about our body but more importantly, about our whole life.
Who we are as human beings, our passions, our loves and the inner workings of our body extends far beneath the surface of what our external appearance provides.
I used to lead the body-shaming bandwagon, constantly complaining about how “fat” I felt. But enough is enough. Here are four reasons why we need to abandon the body-shaming for good:
Confidence is the new sexy. Plain and simple, confidence is sexy. Nothing screams “lack of confidence” like a girl who constantly complains about how chubby her stomach looks in her bikini. Own your body for what it is and how it looks in this moment. It’s perfectly fine to have fitness or weight-loss goals, but it’s vital that we learn to appreciate our bodies, as they are no matter how near or far we are from the ultimate “goal.” Women who radiate confidence also radiate beauty, regardless of their jean size.
Selfishness. Practicing gratitude is one of the healthiest things we can do for ourselves. It is selfish to place so much focus on the negatives when life is bursting with positive people, opportunities and privileges for us to be grateful. Rather than getting fixated on lack of a thigh gap or extra arm fat, you should be thanking your lucky stars every single day that you have a body that can do pretty much anything and everything your heart desires. When we focus on everything we wish we could change about our bodies, we take for granted all of the incredible things we are able to experience with it.
Stop setting a bad example. The people who surround us, especially when we are young, often leave a lasting impact on our character and habits. A child who observes your dissatisfied face in the mirror as you look at your legs, watches as you pull at the fat on your stomach or hears you say how much you hate your arms, will internalize those actions in some way or another. Be it conscious or subconscious, we pick up habits somewhere and mimic actions we viewed in the past. Negative body image and body-shaming habits are highly influential and adapted much more easily than we assume.
Positivity is contagious. If you jump off the body-shaming bandwagon, chances are others will, too. Be the friend to make a change, to put an end to a bad habit that does nothing but bring you and others down. Rather than partaking or contributing to the negativity of group body shaming, empower one another. We should be celebrating our success instead of complaining about our problems.
We only have so much space in our minds, and life is too short to waste it with negative thoughts regarding our bodies. Our thoughts create our realities, so why not choose positive ones?
*With apologies to Meghan Trainor.
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Joshua Cyril Constante Razon writes about things that makes him strong and vulnerable at the same time. He turned 20 last month.
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